I don't know much about raising kids because I don't have any. But I do know about being raised. My parents were always real with me. I've seen them fight, cry, get angry, apologize, laugh, pray, worry, scold, teach, serve, study, hurt, succeed, mourn, comfort, the list could go on and on. My parents have been such a huge part of my coming to know Christ. I hope I am half the parent they are when I have children.
I can remember my mom making me sit and read to her at night. I hated every minute of it. I wanted to be off running around and playing. But she made me read to her anyway. Now I want to be a writer. When I started wearing make-up, my mom took me to the Estee Lauder counter at the mall and had them do me up right. She didn't want me to look like a clown, so she invested the time and money to help me learn how to wear it. She even took me to "charm school" one summer. She went with me. We learned how to sit properly, walk properly, talk, etc. My mom loves to learn. Through the years I have gone to cooking classes, sewing classes, basket-weaving, painting, drawing. Some of the classes were for me, some were for her and she dragged me along. It taught me the value of being your own person-pursuing your own interests, despite being a wife and mother. In addition to classes on cake decorating, flower arranging, and becoming a Master Gardener through the County Extension service, my mom also went to college when she was in her 40's and finished her degree in Psychology.
In addition to all that learning, she has also taught me how to serve. I can't tell you how many nursing homes and little old widow ladies I have visited over the years with her. I also marveled when she taught Sunday school and all the flip charts and puppets and bulletin boards she created. We've taken countless casseroles to sick people, new mothers, grieving families, etc. She has helped raise money for a paralyzed lady and taken in visiting missionaries. She has taken on many of my friends as if they were her own, welcoming them into our home-even inviting them to spend Christmas with our family. When I was in college, our house was often the local hang-out. Sometimes the living room would be so full of people that you could barely walk through. My parents would retreat to their room and leave the house to us (I think they were mostly relieved to know I wasn't out tying one on somewhere!).
My mom reaches out to all kinds of people. One Christmas, we had a house full of people that had no families. They all became part of our family that year. We ate until we were sick, played games, watched Christmas movies, etc.
My mom has also taught me to laugh. We can get cracked up at some of the most off the wall things. We almost had to leave the theater when we saw "Bruce Almighty" together because we were laughing so hard. And if she ever gets tickled at a TV show, you can be sure that you will hear her laughter no matter where you are in the house. Many times my dad and I have been drawn out of another room, completely intrigued and amused by her hysterical laughter. She loves to go to Hallmark stores and read funny cards. She doesn't mind the stares and whispers. She just laughs all the more.
My mom has celebrated victories with me, cried with me over broken hearts, and even taught me about men by rebuking me when I didn't treat boyfriends the way I should.
Most importantly I recall all the times I observed her curled up in a chair with her Bible and a notebook. I remember all the times we've prayed together and discussed God's Word and His Will. She has taught me to know what I believe and why, to stand up for what's right, to depend on God and to trust Him with everything.
As for my dad, I remember all the Sundays when we would have "dinner on the grounds" at church, and he stood patiently waiting until everyone in the place had fixed their plate before he would eat. He's always been a leader in the church, teaching Sunday school, serving as a deacon, leading a small group. When I was a teenager, we went to a small church that had no youth minister. My parents made sure we had activities, devo's, went to youth rallies, etc. My dad even wrote a newsletter for the youth group. He wanted to make sure I had as much exposure to Christ as possible at that critical age in my life.
I can remember many nights we have sat up late talking about all kinds of things, anywhere from boys to the Bible to fears/doubts/decisions to hobbies. My dad is a counselor by trade now, but he hasn't always been (at least not to the general public!). I guess I was good practice for him! Recently we had a hurricane come through our town, and my dad called one of the emergency shelters and offered to come give free counseling if anyone there needed it.
My dad isn't afraid to stand up for what he believes in. He will boycott companies that support/promote ungodly things. He keeps up with what's going on in the world. He isn't afraid to enter into an "intelligent discussion" with anyone and vocalize his viewpoint, even if it is different from theirs. I have seen him pouring over the Word and studying for hours on end. His collection of commentaries and other Biblical reference books always makes me salivate.
My dad just seems to know everything. I'm sure everyone thinks their dad is the smartest man alive, but mine really seems to be! You can ask him about almost anything. He might not be an expert on the topic, but you can almost bet he knows something about it. It's amazing. He exposes himself to a lot, so he absorbs a lot. He watches the news, the History channel, the Discovery channel, listens to Christian radio, etc. He uses words I've never even heard of sometimes. My mom and I joke that we need a dictionary to understand him.
My dad has also given me the gift of independence. Just because I'm a girl doesn't mean my dad didn't stick a power tool in my hand and teach me how to fix it myself (or at least try). I have spent countless hours with him underneath my car (now I will say that I have no clue how to fix cars, but I am good at handing out tools...). He has given me the confidence to try things for myself. I have replaced pipes under my kitchen sink, repaired toilets, built things with wood and power saws and drills--all because he refused to let me be helpless. I love him for that.
My dad and I are good at making each other cry. He's written things for my high school graduation, given me jewelry with a special analogy tied in, made those "dad" speeches about being proud... I tell him he is getting sappy in his old age. I can write him a card, and tears will glisten in his eyes (he's probably crying reading this blog right now!).
My dad also loves to laugh. Some of my favorite memories are around the dining room table, telling stories and acting crazy. Heads thrown back, laughter abounds.
When I was young, we used to live in North Alabama where it actually snowed from time to time. My dad would tie a rope to the handle of a metal trash can lid, sit me on it and take off running down the street. He also used to grab my knees and squeeze them, telling me that was how a cow ate corn-which of course used to send me straight to the floor in a fit of laughter (I am very ticklish).
I am so very lucky to have these two wonderful people in my life. They have taught (and continue to teach) me so much. I am where I am as a person and as a Christian because of them. I couldn't have picked a better family to have been born into. I am eternally grateful to God for the wonderful gift that is my family!!
I love y'all~~
Our little family way back when (1973)
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