I've been having this weird feeling in my chest lately. I'm not going around doing the Fred Sanford or anything, but it does feel odd nonetheless. I just wanted to let someone know - if I don't show up at work tomorrow, can someone come check on me before the decomp smell embeds itself in the sheetrock and my family has difficulty re-selling the house? Thanks.

Now, on to bigger and better things. God led me to start reading the book of James this week. I am taking a different approach to reading than ever before. This time I am only reading a few verses a day, reading them multiple times, sometimes pulling out a couple of different commentaries, letting the verses sink in, and praying about them. I have been amazed at how each day the verses seem to coincide with something going on in my life.

Yesterday God convicted me about some things in my life that weren't honoring Him. I hadn't really given much thought to it before, but I knew I needed to confront them. Then I got to the verses about being tempted by your desires and that leading to death. THEN I got an email devotional from a guy who simply shares whatever God speaks to him each morning. Yesterday he said that God spoke to him about repentance and requiring pinpoint obedience. And that if people refused to repent they were going to enter into a long season of drought.

I was burdened all day until I dealt with it. After I did, I began to feel better. Then I came home tonight and lo and behold, "If you keep looking steadily into God's perfect law - the law that sets you free - and if you do what it says and don't forget what you heard, then God will bless you for doing it." (James 1:25)

I am amazed when God speaks to me. I am amazed that He would even want to. That amazement also fosters doubt that what I "hear" is even God. Knowing how human I am and how much I mess up every day, I think I sometimes have a hard time believing that even I could be privileged enough to have Him direct anything toward me. But looking back over the past 2 days - there is not doubt in my mind that He clearly communicates with us, puts things on our hearts, speaks to us through avenues other than the Bible, and uses everything in our spirits and in the world around us to lead us closer to Him.

I still have some other thorn bushes in my spirit that need dealing with, but I am confident that one victorious step toward obedience will lead to another and another and another. And I am reminded that He really does speak to me, and many of those times I have wondered about the "voice" really were Him. I don't know why we get so hung up in doubt sometimes. I guess Satan takes our feelings of unworthiness and uses them to make us believe we really are unworthy. But because of Jesus, I am worthy! Praise Him!