Blood Suckers

I just killed a mosquito. There he sat, loosening the little buckle on his tiny little pants, getting ready to kick back and take a nap after filling his belly. Just picture his little feet crossed and his eyelids getting heavy as he lets out a little sigh of satisfaction.

**SQUISH!!**

Don't feel sorry for him. That little leech just invaded my privacy. He violated me and stole my very life force without even so much as a warning. At least the Red Cross has the decency to call you every 3 minutes to beg and plead before they drain your veins.

To make matters worse, when I squished him - he had the audacity to squirt my own blood all over my desk. That little glutton took advantage of me, then left a mess for me to clean up. Not to mention that I will be scratching my elbow all night where he dug his little fangs in for a nice big gulp.

People can be sort of like mosquitoes sometimes. I think everyone I know has had a "mosquito" in their life at some point or another. Well - for all of you mosquito victims out there, I will plant a tiny flag of victory tonight (metaphorically speaking, of course).

Call me Franky

Well, a lot has transpired since my last post. Let's see...I put my house on the market on July 11. It sold on July 12, and I have to be out by August 3rd. I put my house hunting into high gear and also found a house that I love. So I will sell my house at 9:30 and buy one at 10:30 this Friday.

Last week I was leaving my parents house and just as I got to the car, I stepped off the curb wrong and sprained my ankle. As I lay in the street on my back like a dead bug, my mom was running back and forth from the car to the house. I asked her to gather all of my belongings (that also when scattering into the street the same time I did) and take them back inside. I had already loaded the pup in the car, so she had to get him back in the house. By then I was able to stop writhing in pain long enough to hop back inside.

I went to the doctor yesterday since my foot still looks like an inflated latex glove. He mashed and poked on it as all good doctors do (I wonder if they have Mashing 101 and Poking & Prodding 201 in med school). I was fine with the mashing until he took to twisting. Twice I almost stood on my eyelashes when he janked it too far to one side. Ultimately that landed me three weeks in physical therapy - oh, and I am now wearing a gigantic frankenstein boot. The boot is actually pretty awesome. It's super comfy and the sole of it is curved like a rocking chair. So it's pretty cool to walk and stand in. If only I had a matching pair...

I start PT tomorrow. I'm sure they will want me to scratch the back of my neck with my third toe or try to lift a boulder with one foot. If luck holds true to form, my therapist will be a close relative of Agatha Trunchbull (the principal from Matilda).

One of the girls at work has started calling me Criptonite. I can't imagine why. Well, at least I haven't set myself on fire lately...